Bad habits-Why are they formed?-How to get rid of them?

Any bad habit is primarily the influence of the environment in which one lives. Therefore one should be very careful about what one sees, hears, and talks. Friends and peers are notorious 'initiators' of bad habits. So one should be careful in picking up friends. Once a bad habit is initiated, there is no requirement of further 'initiators' as the person acquiring the bad habit/s becomes a 'perpetuator'/'manintainer' of the bad habit/s.
Teenage is the most dangerous age as most bad habits take firm roots during this period. These days, the media is another big source of ideas for kids to pick up bad habits easily. The 'perpetuating' tendency starts taking deeper and deeper roots until the person becomes addicted to the vices. Psychology is another factor to be taken into account in understanding the development of vices. Some people continue smoking and drinking (and these days the notorious habit of drugs) to suppress their anger and also give vent to their hidden and suppressed emotions. In addition to anger which is one of the maintainer of the vices, some other emotions like unsatisfied love, unsatisfied desires too make their way into the 'emotional drain-line' of vices.
So what is the solution for all of this? First of all, kids and teenagers need to have good company who are far away from any sorts of vices. Faith and hope in the ALMIGHTY are two strong ropes which can rally good people together. Parents should see that their children are in the right company. Absolute faith in the ALMIGHTY from one's childhood helps in the development of a good foundation for one's future life. And the first teacher obviously would be the mother. If the mother inculcates good values in the kids right from the beginning; there is every hope that though children might stray a bit from the straight path, the children will eventually come back to the straight path. True, the tendency to experiment is very strong in kids and teenagers but eventually with the right guidance they will fall back on the right track. Thus, parents should act as strong guardians over a child's development without compromising the child's freedom. It is a dangerous and hard trapeze-act absolutely for the parents. But child management is one science which no school can teach. It has to be learnt and applied by the parents with utmost judgement.
Suppose, if a child or for that matter anyone does develop bad habits. One of the golden rules to be remembered is that the wrong-doer should never be reprimanded in public. Public reprisal tends to backfire very severely, trust me! Instead, the wrong-doer should be gently advised in private with the softest of words. Another bad rule is comparison of a kid with bad habits or bad manners to another kid who has good habits and manners. This should never be done, not even between siblings. Period! The reason for this is this leads to feelings of jealousy, rivalry, etc.. Every human being has an innate GOD-given sense of right and wrong. He or she should be given the oppurtunity for introspection and self-correction. This will provide sufficient time for the person on the wrong track to correct himself.

Online spending time

Blogging/chatting/surfing!
These terms look very familiar, ain't they? Well, how much time do these activities take away from our precious time? A lot probably. So, the best thing would be to impose a voluntary curfew on these and devote one's time to other useful activities. Give it a start!

Spying

I do not know exactly when spying started in this wonderful universe created by the ALMIGHTY. Probably Satan (the mother of all evils) was the first spy as he had spied upon Prophet Adam (peace be upon him) and his wife, Hawwah (Eve); made them aware of their shame and ultimately made us live in this present-day 'pregnant beyond its term' (read 'overcrowded') earth of ours.
In the Holy Quran, ALMIGHTY ALLAH says: "O you who believe! Avoid much suspicions, indeed some suspicions are sins. And spy not, neither backbite one another. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would hate it (so hate backbiting). And fear Allâh. Verily, Allâh is the One Who accepts repentance, Most Merciful."(Quran, 49:12)
I know that in some places spying is a tradition but I have really never understood how one could stoop to such levels. Trust me, this is worse than watching pornography and other sins! I ask the ALMIGHTY to first of all put me on the right path and everyone else out there too.
Those who spy, refrain from doing so. For you never know when you will be caught unawares. And whatever happens in this world is like a merri-go-round. The people who spy on others will be spied upon too by others. The spies have to remember that.

Quotes

"Whatever one does, one needs to do it with all sincerity. Half-hearted, insincere attempts not only flop miserably but also lead to greater destruction."

Struggle b/w Sleeping and remaining Awake

I am sure everyone faces this problem everyday, especially the Muslims. I am talking about getting up early in the morning and remaining awake after that. As most of you might be knowing, Muslims pray five times a day and the first prayer is very early in the morning at least one hour before sunrise. Now, most of the people get up, pray and then head back to dream-zone. But the time after the prayer until the sun rises completely is a very useful one. The Prophet Mohammed (peace be upon him) used to remain in the same spot where he performed prayer, do dhikr (remembering ALMIGHTY ALLAH) or read the Quran and did not rise until the sun had risen completely. He would then perform the Shuruq (sunrise) prayer and then leave.

I understand it is difficult especially for all those night-owls out there but trust me. Day-birds are lot better than night-owls. I think the productivity of people who remain awake and don't sleep and all the people who wake up early in the morning is far better than the people who do not wake up in the morning. One good thing about the people in the United States is they get up early in the morning. I find people coming to departmental stores like County or getting ready to eat breakfast in McDee's or jogging or just having a pleasant walk!

So all you night-owls out there - Wake up early and go to bed early! And be sure to take the afternoon nap (not more than 20 minutes) - this siesta-routine was followed by even the Prophet Mohammed (peace be upon him) and several other famous people. These days some companies are providing accomodations to their employees. Not for nothing! Studies have indicated increase in employee-productivity among employees who take siestas.
All right! Lemme have a small nap now. :) Just kidding!

Rules of profile-sites

These days profile-sites like linkedin, orkut, facebook, myspace have become part and parcel of one's lives. Everyone seems to have his/her profile listed (that includes me :)). Anyways I learnt a few things about adding one's profiles to these sites-

1. When adding friends be sure to invite/add to those profiles which your friend uses actively.
2. Profiles appear to be of two kinds - professional and non-professional.
3. Desis seem to use orkut a lot while the Americans seem to use facebook and myspace the most. Now there are exceptions obviously.
4. Be like a fisherman (or a fisherwoman:) - Try to cast your net far and wide. Hey you never know! And you lose nothing by inviting except breaking the ice between you and a fellow human-being! Righty!
5. And if you do not get a response immediately do not despair. It might be that some people do not check their e-mails or their profile-sites regularly. So have patience. Patience always helps you know!

I guess design plays a very important role in people's selection of profile-sites. Students seem to value 'design' the most and of all the profile-sites, american students seem to like facebook the most (at least all the people I know). To me, facebook is like a hollywood flick while orkut seems to be like our own desi bollywood 'masala' film with all the 'jigel-jigel'. Myspace seems to have a mixed following as the design is unique.

There is a saying-'A picture is worth a thousand words'. There is another saying-'The face is the index of the mind'. Both are absolutely true and this is nowhere else more evident than in profile-sites. Especially when it comes to facebook, students seem to select the main picture (profile-badge) with great care. There is something unique about these profile-badge pictures in most of the profiles. Probably the profile-owner is trying to convey something to others!

Now go ahead guys and gals! Extend your horizons far and wide. Best of luck.

Assalamalaikum Wa Rahamatullahi Wa Barakaatuhu

It means "May the peace, mercy and blessings of ALLAH be upon you". Welcome!